Hello babe It’s scary how quickly everything can change isn’t it ? How things can just fall apart. All I cared about was your happiness and what you wanted, you know I was always there for you if you needed me. You always used to say it takes two, but others don’t see it that…

Hi Big Lad Well here we are at the start of another new month without you. I cry myself hollow over you every single day without exception. You’re death has completely shattered me, it’s hit so very hard. I know there’s all those old clichés, you know the ones, it’ll get better in time, it’ll…

So many questions and no answers. Why can’t I pull myself together? Why am I finding everything so difficult? I don’t know why I can’t just dust myself off and get on with everyday life. I don’t know why I’m finding the day to day so hard , other people manage it so why can’t…

This week has been a tough one , I think I’ve really acknowledged how scared I am at the moment. Last night I just really needed a hug, all I wanted was to feel his arms around me , my head resting on his chest. I miss that easy feeling of contentment,  that feeling of…

Well by some minor miracle I’ve dragged myself through another week. Oh don’t get me wrong I’m still a total mess. Back to bouts of crying in public (and private of course), and I still haven’t managed to get my arse back to work. Everything has sort of lost all meaning to be honest. I’ve…