Just a quick one , it’s 5:55am and I haven’t been able to sleep. Thought’s and memories are running over and over. There are things you told me that I wish you never had. One of the things you told me makes me feel sick and sad for you all at the same time. Why did you tell me ? Let’s be honest it was never going to paint you in a good light was it ? What on earth made you think I’d want to know ? To me it just highlighted your insecurities. I’ve never been one for self delusion , I leave that to others, but I would have rather been spared your confession that time. I’m getting the blame for you and I, but you were always going to be looking because deep down you knew you weren’t happy. I love the bloody bones of you but part of our history is hard and memories pop up that I don’t want to remember because they hurt so much. They take away from the good and I don’t want that. To quote you “it’s a right head fuck”. I wonder what you would have done differently had you known how short your time would be. I feel really tormented by lots of things , and they’ll never be any answers. I will always love you with all my heart.

Girl Almighty