Hi Nige, I’m just breaking down all the time lately. I’m exhausted and I’m lonely and I’m pissed off. I feel on edge and I’m  restless. Still doing the whole counselling thing, but to be honest I don’t feel like I’m making any progress. You go and talk , bear your soul and get upset and then it’s like right “see you next week” .  I did open up a little bit about you , more specifically the things you said , the things you did , the things you told me , the way you were and the way you could be. Some of the things embarrassed me and I also felt embarrassed for you. Sometimes I wonder why I keep so much inside , I’ve been berated , criticised and ranted at about you. I’ve been ridiculed and insulted because of you. Yet everyone thinks I should consider everybody else. Better not divulge some hard truths about you , that’s disrespectful. I’m fucking angry at you for all the shit and baggage you left me with. Sometimes I want to scream I’m so frustrated. People all over the world read the blog , but my,  someone certainly does enjoy reading the same post over and over. I sometimes wish they’d just ask whatever it is they want to know.

Even now I still love you , fucking fool that I am. I could really do with a hug , but I’ll have to settle for crying into my pillow. How the fuck did everything go so wrong ?

Girl Almighty