Out of nowhere tonight a memory popped up. “I don’t care about anything else, I just need to see you now” , I remember you saying that to me two years ago today. I miss our calls , our texts , our moments. I sat on the bed we laid in together today , I…

Hey Handsome You’re still there , front and centre, you always will be, but I need to try and find a way to exist without you around. I’ve been talking it through and I know that there are things I need to do concerning you , things I should have done before now. I’ve tried…

I’m finally going to talk about the elephant in the room, the elephant being mental health. Yes progress has been made , but there is still so much ignorance surrounding the subject. The sad fact is that we as people love to judge. Personally I’ve had ups and downs with my mental health for as…

Just sat thinking about things. In two weeks it’ll be Tramlines, I remember two years ago , lovely memories ❤ , but it would be your last summer and we never even knew it. My heart aches for all the things you’ll miss, all the life you should still be living. All the thousands of…

So , it’s been a little time Nige. I was going to say ‘When did life become so surreal’ , but I know exactly when things changed. It was Owls in the Park this Saturday just gone , ordinarily you’d have been there , enjoying the day. The same day on my memories was a…

Evening Nige Do you remember saying those words to me ? It feels like a lifetime ago , in truth it was just under two years ago. The thing is I didn’t always know. Today I’m fucked off that I gave you so much and you left me in this shit storm , you left…

Hi It’s been one of those strange days today , you know where you just feel uneasy in yourself. I went past where your accident happened today , the sign has finally gone. I’m grateful to whoever took it down , but needless to say , I wish it had never needed to be put…

Hi, I listened to your voice today , I don’t know why I do it to myself . I’m just stuck in this place , stuck in this feeling. Maybe I’m so over emotional because I’m really tired and really lonely. You inspired such love,  sometimes for a second I wonder if it would have…

Hi Nige , Just a quick one tonight,  today has been a beautiful day  weather wise, it may even  have been a ‘you full kit off in your shed looking fit af’ kind of day. God I miss you , I wish you could have been saved. What’s wrong with me ? Why does it…

Well  today,  by the skin of my teeth, I’ve dodged having to have a blood transfusion. I’m taking that as a win , I may need one later, but I’ll cross that bridge if and when I get to it. I need to start taking better care of myself , and I’m trying to ,…