The Girl Almighty

  • Breathe in, breathe out

    Alright Handsome Another week almost over. You know of all the days, the crying days , the ‘what if’ days, the ‘why you’ days , the wishing I was wherever you are now days, it’s the angry days I hate the most. I’ve had a few of those this past week and the angry days…

  • Big Girls Cry When Their Hearts Are Breaking

    Well by some minor miracle I’ve dragged myself through another week. Oh don’t get me wrong I’m still a total mess. Back to bouts of crying in public (and private of course), and I still haven’t managed to get my arse back to work. Everything has sort of lost all meaning to be honest. I’ve…

  • Tattoos, Tears, Tablets & Tramlines

    Hi Handsome, What a roller coaster week it’s been. So I had a memorial tattoo done for you and M has done an amazing job. Some of your handwriting is at the side, it’s beautiful, I hope you like it. I still just take one day at a time , I’m still in quite a…

  • A Little Bit Of Peace

    Today I went and got my memorial tattoo done, it’s so beautiful. In a strange way it’s brought me some peace, I know that probably sounds a little bit mad, but hey you do what you have to do. I’ve found the last few days really difficult, so to feel that little bit of calm…

  • Stormy Weather

    A little like the weather at the moment my emotions are all over the place. My feelings fluctuate throughout the day and into the night, it can feel exhausting mentally and physically. Lately there’s been times just drift off, watching the rain and listening to the rhythmic patter on the windows. It’s soothing in a…

  • Anger, Grief & Guilt

    I’m angry, there i said it. Right now I’m so bloody angry about so many things. I’m angry at you for being in the accident, I’m angry at the driver of the car that hit you, I’m angry I’m being told I can’t mourn you and don’t count, and I’m angry at having to eat…

  • You’re the only one I can talk to

    Hi Trouble Fuck, everything is such a mess. My blog and twitter posts were never about upsetting other people. I just need to get it out, the way I feel, because it becomes too much. I know people don’t understand, because they have each other to lean on and support, I envy them that ,…

  • Circle of One

    I’ve felt lonely before, but nothing quite on this scale. We live in the age of social media where people flippantly write posts urging everyone to #bekind and claiming to be all clued up on mental health issues and a myriad of other things. In reality it’s all bullshit, they’re much happier to ignore the…

  • Hi Big Lad So I’ve had more shouty, angry, demanding and mildly threatening messages from yours. I’ve been accused of being disrespectful towards you , I really don’t get how me mourning you is disrespectful, just because they don’t like it. For obvious reasons I haven’t got some of the traditional steps in the grieving…

  • The ebb and flow of grief

    Ebb and flow is the perfect idiom to describe grief, one moment it’s a huge tidal wave pulling you under, suffocating you, another moment it’s just feeling completely numb. Grief is also a hugely individual experience. For me at the moment disbelief is massive part of it, several times a day it’s almost like I…